I hate SimmerChars. They're absolute pieces of excrement. If me and my roomies weren't so broke, I'd take that hunk of junk and dynamite it just for the satisfaction. There's a problem with doing that too. Not only do I have to buy a det-pack just to destroy that cursed thing, secondly, I'd have to buy two inventing skill books just to get up to the level that I need in order to be able to detonate it. Needless to say that ain't happening anytime soon. Plus I'd also need the simoleons I get in return for selling it back to the shop in exchange for buying a better quality range.
Of course that miserable weasel comes in and tries to shoo me out of whatever room I'm in. Doesn't the wretch know that I'm trying to cook here so that goofball won't starve. I'm so annoyed that I slap the ever-lovin' bejeepers out of him. Well...he won't be a "friend" anytime soon, not that I want him to be. I just want them all scared. ~cue evil laugh, right on time...~ "Quit shooing me out of the room, dweeb or I'll give you something to cry about..."
"Ow...you hit me...you evil jerk."
"Well, then quit shooing me out of the room while I'm trying to cook. If you want to go up like a lighted torch, that ain't my problem, but not while I'm in the same house as you miserable wretches. You got me?" Don't make me angry, Phil, you won't like me when I'm angry.
Phil buggered off somewhere, I guess, to the bathroom to cry or something. Who cares. Me, I had some waffles that I needed to finish cooking before I was rudely interrupted. Maybe that jerk will get the message that if I'm at the stove, don't bug me.
Well, nothing like causing a public disturbance outside the bookstore. Got out my podium and started ranting on something or the other, I forget. But it must have been important enough for me to get worked up about. Hey why not, because I can. Just had to deafen Connor Frio while I was at it too. Silly dimwit walked right in front of my megaphone. Serves him right.
Since I hate eating burnt food which seems to be all that everyone else can make, I bought myself two skill books, Cooking 1 and Cooking 2. I got through the first book sitting on my behind on a park bench. Can they make them more uncomfortable. I guess it keeps the vagrants from sleeping on them and well, if they sleep on the ground, the ants will get them. It's a sure way to drive them out of town. Maybe if I upend an ant-farm...
I knew River was at work and decided that well, maybe being hitched wasn't so bad of an option, it would mean that I would never achieve my lifetime wish of being a gold-digger, but River wasn't a bad-looking sim...in fact she was hot in a "girl-next-door" kind of way and well, Evil Haruo gets what Evil Haruo wants. So I decided that I'm going to get on my podium and proclaim my love for River McIrish. Hot damn, that worked.
...because when I got home...
...and guess who decides that he's going to want to cut in...and talk to River. Nobody comes between my girl and me. Not if he relishes breathing.
Yeah, pretty much, River wasn't digging the interruption either. So I decide that it's time to reassert my dominance over that beta-male Phil and went over and interrupted him to talk to my girl.
Well...you know what...evidently he had the cojones to interrupt me for a second time...then what's even worse is that Phil decided that he was going to shoo me away. You...lowly little peon. You think you're going to shoo me away? Well, my anger meter just pretty much soared to the point of no-return.
I drew back my arm and drove my right fist into his skull...
Nighty-night, Phil!
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