Torturing Phil

When Phil woke up from his impromptu nap on the floor, the sun had risen on yet another day in Sunset Valley. Sarcastically asking him if he'd had a nice sleep, probably wasn't the best thing to do, but what did I care?

"No...my neck is killing me and I'm cold"

"Go take a hot shower and stick your face in it...don't forget to breathe deep." Yeah, I know, that was evil.

"But if I breathe in water...I'll..."

That's the point, Phil...

"You're a jerk, Haruo..."

"Yeah yeah...tell me something I don't know"

"I'm going out..." Phil muttered to himself.

"Don't get hit by a car..." I replied casually, not that I really cared. I'm sure the car that hit him in Gr. 8 had to have massive repairs done to it; just didn't want a repeat of it.

I cooked yet another meal for Phil and Catherine. At least it was something so that the two of them wouldn't starve because unless they were reminded by River, they might actually forget to eat, which would result in my being able to sell their bunkbed. Yeah, the fridge was a piece of **** too.

The graveyard looked very nice this time of year. ~smirk~ Decided to go catacomb spelunking and well, somebody by the name of Beau Andrews told me that it was fun. Well, he's going to suffer...badly. He didn't tell me about the zombie bears. I'm going to skin him alive.

That left me rather fried so I had to sneak into the 24 Hr Wellness Gym to use their showers again. So much for dumpster diving today.

Decided to bike home and take the rest of the day off...and then of course that witch Catherine decides that she's going to scare the living kaka out of me.

Thanks a freaking lot, nearly peed my pants too. After zombie bears this morning, I don't need this crud. And well, I decided to investigate that little thing that ended up in our yard. That probably wasn't the wisest thing to do.

Guy that came out of it looked like Doc Brown with blue hair. He told me his name was Emit Relevart and well, he told me to go pick up some power cells that were scattered all over the yard. What the hell did he think I was, his man-servant, but at least he asked nicely so I was inclined to do him a favour at least. And then it hit me. I could effect change on this miserable little town up to and including the future. Oh yeah...that made me a very very happy sim.

Gleefully, evilly happy. I could turn where Emit came from into an utter dystopia. With me as its ultimate ruler. Oh this was even better than being a gold digger. And River would be my queen. Have to have someone to appease the masses of lowly peons doing my bidding. She'd be able to do that with her good nature to keep the heat off me.

Well, back to reading cooking books. Emit may or may not be back, but at least I have access to the time portal. Wait'll they get a load of me... BWA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA!!!!!

It had cleared up enough from all that incessant rain so River was playing in the puddles, making more laundry to do...(if we had a washer and dryer) Since we didn't we had to wash our clothes in the sink and then hang them up to dry. But Phil decided that he was going to go over there and try to scare River. I, on the other hand, had other plans.

You scare my girl, I pound the living stuffing out of you. See how simple a concept that is, Phil?

River was quite appreciative of that...and well...that actually led to a quite "enjoyable time".

Dang...morning saw me headfirst in the dumpster again. Being an evil person destined to take over the entire world costs money.